Southpaw Jones

Southpaw Jones presents
Is This Interesting?
The core of the blogosphere, thoughts and feelings that might not matter:

Did I mention I’m unemployed? Yeah, well, aside from playing clever folk tunes for dozens and dozens of people. How do you think I got this blog built and pretty? At the moment, I’m sitting at Flipnotics, one of my favorite hangs in Austin. Sometimes, when I’m better dressed, I head across the street to Austin Java, but today is all about pony tails and hairy legs for the Paw Man. Anyhoo, I’m peacefully working on the blog when a bunch of suits come in and start talking business. What else can I do but jot down some of the foreign phrases coming from their pie-holes? Here’s a few:

I am VERY passionate about non-profit.
Pulling in multiple vendors.
Part of the reason for my involvement in the campaign is making new contacts.
I like your Bottom Line mentality.
Let’s put money in each other’s pockets.
How many employees do we have?
We’re gonna get asked that, you know.
It’s right out of the Microsoft playbook!

Spike Gillespie presents
A Haiku History of the World
A look at our past, / seventeen syllables and / three lines at a time:

Dinosaurs tromp tromp,
act tough, then die so Spielberg
can win more Oscars.

Atomic Robot presents
Wikipedioh?
What you might not know about what you might now know:

The Colossal Squid
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colossal_Squid” target=new

So you knew that Giant Squid really exist, right? Well, there’s a species of squid out there that is even more massive than Giant Squid. They’re called Colossal Squid.

Here’s what Wikipedia says:

“The Colossal Squid (Mesonychoteuthis hamiltoni), sometimes called the Antarctic or Giant Cranch Squid, is believed to be the largest squid species, and the only member of the genus Mesonychoteuthis. Current estimates put its maximum size at 14 meters (46 feet), based on analysis of smaller and immature specimens, making it the largest known invertebrate.”

Its tentacles are armed with retractable hooks and serrated suckers, the marks of which can be found on sperm whales in the southern seas. It also has the largest eyes of any animal on earth at over a foot in diameter.

Here’s what Wikipedia DOESN’T tell you:

The Colossal Squid’s diet consists mostly of pirates and oil tankers. It has the ability to send its gigantic, deadly tentacles into your house’s plumbing and up through your toilet, throttling you while you read Family Circus or Reader’s Digest. You are not safe anywhere. Also, every surface you touch is teeming with infectious bacteria and isn’t safe to touch without surgical gloves or tissue paper. Show me all the blueprints! Wave of the future!!!

Abi Tapia presents
Abi Tapia’s America
Our own wanderlusty singer/songwriter offers views from her lens:

Southpaw Jones presents
Rhyme Time!
One clue whose answer consists of two rhyming words:

The loose jaw flesh of a wise bird (1 syllable each)
Highlight here for answer: [owl’s jowls]

Thank you, come again!