Southpaw Jones

Is This Interesting?
Thoughts/feelings that just might not matter:

I used to be an 11-year-old boy, you see, so consider me a former first-hand expert. If you know a kid with a birthday coming up, or if you’re trying to get closer to your step-son or whatever, here are some useful ideas.
Pass it around.
Share it with friends.
You’re welcome!

NOTE: This list is NOT to be used for Pied Piper-esque nefariousness. And NO military recruiters allowed! Shoo!

• Periscopes
• Nunchucks
• Black Holes
• Spies
• Pulleys/Zip Lines
• Cuss words
• Venus Fly Traps
• Slingshots
• Petrified wood
• Wolverine/wolverines
• Amphibians
• Eclipses
• Rope (swings)
• Acid
• Whirlpools
• Model Rockets
• Ninja stars
• Daydreams
• Big League Chew
• Sides/Teams
• Headstands
• Kickstands
• Transformation
• Glaciers/Alaska
• Crawdads/Crawfish/Crayfish
• Drunk adults
• Double-jointedness
• Brass knuckles
• Test tubes
• Jumping off high places without getting hurt (requires hay, water, bungee, wings, jet pack, hang glider, superpower, etc.)

Quotopia
Freshly-picked quotes from the ol’ reference collection:

Crown. Gold. Good choice. When you want stability, you go for gold.
My New German Dentist, labeling my chomper adjustments

Online Museum of the Week
Pimp Cups!:

Rhyme Thyme!
One clue whose answer consists of two rhyming words:

Ok, Bomb Squad trainees, listen up! Occasionally, you’ll get someone who doesn’t want you disarming the bomb. You say, “Let me take care of that,” and they say, “No, thanks.” We call this…
Highlight here for answer: [refusing defusing]

Upcoming Show(s)
Where can I see Southpaw in the flesh?

Thursday, August 2nd, 2007
8:00 PM
Matt the Electrician & Southpaw Jones
Flipnotics at the Triangle
4600 Guadalupe
Austin, TX
(512) 380-0097
www.flipnotics.com
The New Weekly Show!

Thank you, come again!
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©2007 Southpaw Jones. All rights reserved.