Southpaw Jones

International Left-Handers’ Day is next Wednesday! Oh, how the great holidays sneak up on me. Have you informed your lefty friends and family?

I found a list of old English terms for southpaws. Most of them are nasty sounding, and that negativity stings even after all these years, but it also builds character, right? Here are a few. Try saying them aloud. Then say them aloud followed by “Jones” to see if there is a better name for me out there.

• Buck-fisted
• Gar-pawed
• Left-kelly
• Cack-handed
• Gibble-fisted
• Caggy
• Golly-handed
• Scoochy
• Kay-neived
• Scrammy-handed
• Corrie-pawed
• Keck-fisted
• Skiffle-handed
• Cow-pawed
• Cuddy-wifter
• Spuddy-handed
• Dolly-pawed
• Squiffy

as reported in The New York Times

August 5, 1908
HYPNOTIZED AT NATAL HOUR.
Pittsfield Husband Put Wife in Sleep Before Birth of Child.
WORCESTER, Mass. — A son was born to-day to Mr. and Mrs. Guy Hemenway of 223 Waconah Street, Pittsfield, while the mother was in a hypnotic sleep, placed there by her husband, who has attained considerable local fame as a hypnotist.

One clue whose answer consists of two rhyming words:

I bet Martha Stewart has a warehouse full of handmade knick-knacks and prototypes that she is experimenting with. I wonder where she keeps all her…

Highlight here for answer: [crafts’ drafts]


Concept Typography Artwork, Animal Kingdom

I’m like the pythagorean theorem. Not too many people know the answer to my game.
Shaquille O’Neal

EVERY DANG THURSDAY
8:00 PM
Flipnotics at the Triangle
4600 Guadalupe
AUSTIN, TX
(512) 380-0097
www.flipnotics.com
________________________________________________________________

SATURDAY, AUGUST 30, 2008
Matt the Electrician & Southpaw Jones
8:00 pm
Wyldwood House Concert
4205 Wyldwood Road
AUSTIN, TX
wyldwood.startlogic.com
________________________________________________________________

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2008
Celebrating the lyrics of CRUELTY!
BookPeople
603 N. Lamar
AUSTIN, TX
(512) 472-5050
www.bookpeople.com