Southpaw Jones

Songmaker • Whimsicologist • Austinite
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Archive for August 28th, 2008

Excepting the Nomination

August 28, 2008 By: Southpaw Jones Category: Interesting? No Comments →

CRUELTY is now available!
Order the CD now at southpawjones.com.
Purchase MP3s at cdbaby.com or Southpaw Jones - Cruelty.
Grab a copy in real time at Waterloo Records or End of an Ear in Austin.
Or buy one from me any Thursday at Flipnotics @ the Triangle.

Tonight is truly an historic one, as I will accept my party’s nomination for Resident of the United States at the Flipnotics (Indoor Stadium) @ the Triangle. I realize I’m not the only person in the world making a speech tonight, but in this day and age, you don’t have to see events live to see them in their entirety.

Unless, of course, said events are not recorded in any way.

My show tonight will not appear on YouTube five minutes after it happens.

Silly pundits will not discuss the intricacies of my performance into the wee hours of the morn.

You won’t be able to read the transcript over and over until the hope hops heartily from your hungry heart.

Then again, maybe I should provide the text of my speech tonight, just in case you choose televised HIM over flesh & blood me:

My fallow Americans,

Hallowed be y’all’s names.

Y’all’s kingdom come, y’all’s will be done in the Middle East, as it is in Middleton, Wisconsin.

Give me this day some tips in the tip jar.

Forgive my pitchiness, should any occur, as I pitch my forgiveness.

Lead me not into worldwide fame and a folksinger’s overdose (too much coffee, Harper’s, and hobo kisses), but please do what you can to deliver me from obscurity.

For y’all rock in so many ways for coming out and supporting me tonight.

Amen.

Play ball!


as reported in The New York Times

August 28, 1908
CHRISTIAN SOCIALISTS MEET.
Hold a Conference at Asbury Park — Plan State Organizations.
ASBURY PARK, N.J. — The Middle States Summer conferences of the Christian Socialist Fellowship opened here this afternoon in Library Hall, and will continue until Sunday next. On the closing day Mrs. Rose Pastor Stokes will make an address on Charity from a Socialist View.


One clue whose answer consists of two rhyming words:

It may appear that domesticated bovine animals graze randomly, but the truth is they seek out the best grass in the field. It seems that just like shoppers…

Highlight here for answer: [cows browse]


The Most Curious Graves and Tombstones




These are strange times. Reason, which once combatted faith and seemed to have conquered it, now has to look to faith to save it from dissolution.
Johan Huizinga


EVERY DANG THURSDAY
8:00 PM
Flipnotics at the Triangle
4600 Guadalupe
AUSTIN, TX
(512) 380-0097
www.flipnotics.com
________________________________________________________________

SATURDAY, AUGUST 30, 2008
Matt the Electrician & Southpaw Jones
8:00 pm
Wyldwood House Concert
4205 Wyldwood Road
AUSTIN, TX
wyldwood.startlogic.com
________________________________________________________________

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 10, 2008
Celebrating the lyrics of CRUELTY!
BookPeople
603 N. Lamar
AUSTIN, TX
(512) 472-5050
www.bookpeople.com

Thank you, come again!
myspace.com/southpawjones
E-mail southpaw@southpawjones.com
©2008 Southpaw Jones. All rights reserved.
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