Southpaw Jones

CRUELTY is now available!
Order the CD now at southpawjones.com.
Purchase MP3s at cdbaby.com or .
Grab a copy in real time at Waterloo Records, End of an Ear, or Bookpeople in Austin.
Or buy one from me any Thursday at Flipnotics @ the Triangle.

Hello friends, and happy Monday to ya. Today is the last day to register to vote in Texas. I am not running for office this year, but you should vote anyhow.

Can I tell you how much fun bulk foods are?

Bulk foods are really fun.

I like to purchase bulk foods at Central Market and Sun Harvest here in Austin.

The experience is rather reminiscent of being a kid in a candy store. Sometimes there’s actual candy! But it’s more adult candy, the kind of candy that won’t kill you or give you diabetes. You can try a couple bites or buy a whole pound, and no one will judge you.

Gone are the shackles and chains of prepackaged cereals and trail mixes! The tyranny of boxes and cartons is utterly impotent in this special section of the grocery store.

“I’d like one grain of rice, please.”

Here are some bulk items I have recently tried:

Wasabi Peas

Ah, the perennial favorite. Spicy, crunchy, and not too terribly unhealthy, I pray. Wasabi is a pick-me-up and a sinus-clearer. Peas are green and round, and like snowflakes, no two are the same. You can’t beat these guys for a night on the town or a day on the couch. Eat some!

Chocolate-Covered Banana Chips

This is quite possibly my favorite food discovery of the year. I love chocolate, and I love it when chocolate convinces me to eat some kind of fruit product. Bananas are the perfect food, right? And chips are the perfect delivery system, right? And chocolate is the perfect coating, so there. Suck ‘em!

Chile-Lime Mango

These heavily-spiced dried fruit strips create a sloppy high school party in your mouth, and you don’t have to worry about your parents coming home! There is enough sweetness to keep things enjoyable, but dang it, you won’t soon forget that crazy first bite. Chew one!

Chocolate Rocks

I have established that I love chocolate, so what if chocolate comes in the form of geologically accurate, colorful stones? It’s a joy for the eyes, the hands, and the mouth! These buggers are far from healthy, but the chocolate is less sweet and more subtle than M&Ms. Eat a handful with a big sip of milk and you’ll have trouble putting them back in the pantry. Excavate them!

Wasabi Peanut Snax

I conclude where I began, in the wonderful world of wasabi. Blammo! These things are way hotter than wasabi peas. Imagine a peanut with some sort of crunchy shell surrounding it. Now coat that shell from pseudo-head to pseudo-toe with alien-green wasabi. Just when you think the heat is going to kill you dead, it fades into the night, leaving a wonderful legume to bring you back to earth. Masticate it!

as reported in The New York Times

October 6, 1908
TO RAFFLE OFF A BABY.
Alton Theatre Gives Chances to All, Barring Negroes and Bachelors.
ALTON, Ill. — A boy baby, six months old, will be raffled off at an Alton theatre Saturday evening. Commencing with this evening’s performance a ticket will be issued to those in the audience, allowing one chance for the baby. No tickets will be issued to negroes and bachelors.

One clue whose answer consists of two rhyming words:

Oh, I’ve been picking up links, ties, and correlations my whole life. It’s not a bad hobby. I can grab a box if you’d like to see some of my…

Highlight here for answer: [connection collection]


Fun with Pie Charts

To try to write a grand cosmical drama leads necessarily to myth. To try to let knowledge substitute ignorance in increasingly larger regions of space and time is science.
Hannes Alfven

EVERY DANG THURSDAY
8:00 PM
Flipnotics at the Triangle
4600 Guadalupe
AUSTIN, TX
(512) 380-0097
www.flipnotics.com
________________________________________________________________

WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 15, 2008
7:00 pm
Bettysport
916 A. West 12th St. 78703
AUSTIN, TX
Happy Hour for Austin Duathletes and Austin Runners Club.
www.bettysport.com
________________________________________________________________

SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 22, 2008
9:00 PM (Doors open at 8.)
Matt the Electrician & Southpaw Jones
Anderson Fair
2007 Grant 77006
HOUSTON, TX
713.528.8576
www.andersonfair.com